Freed

You tried to take me, my soul
Until I learned to gain control
You hurt me in ways I couldn’t let go
Locking my pain inside so no one would know
Desperately wanting my father’s love
Realizing my Father is the man above
Looking for love in the wrong places
Pushing past the hurt of many different faces
Made mistakes I can’t take back
Now focused on getting my life on track
Releasing the flash backs and nightmares
That haunted when no one cared
Finding and truly loving me
All that pain and hurt finally freed

Aim

Drips dropping slowly

Forming a knowing

Of obstacles and triumphs

In my throat formed a lump

Knowing what to do

Confidence seeping through

Finding my way in this place called life

Made amends with all this so called strife

Letting go of inhibitions

Making better decisions

My life I reclaim

To higher heights I aim

Deceit

Deceit

Not falling for your lies

Revealing your disguise

Elated I didn’t release my heart to you

Bigger and better opportunities I pursue

I deserve more respect than you have given

But all is forgiven

Because it’s not my place to judge

It’s not even worth me holding a grudge

I am not that same person anymore

No longer making the same mistakes as before

The difference is that I love and respect me now

Demanding what I deserve, I vow

Not wasting time in sorrow

Looking forward to a brighter tomorrow

Not even worthy of shedding a tear

When I know my heart is sincere

No longer giving to the undeserved

Especially when it’s unearned

No longer serving a purpose, cutting off all ties

Seeing truth beyond blatant falsies and deceit

 

Double Crossed

Double Crossed

You were the one I thought I’d spend my life with

But our “happily ever after” was a myth

I thought I knew you, everything about you

But your lies have been seen through

It hurts because above all else you were my best friend

That one person I could always depend

Now our friendship must cease

Leaving my broken heart in one piece

But at least now I know the truth

And am sure of what’s it’s my view

Now it’s time to let go and move on

My love is now withdrawn

Because you were never worthy of me

Not worthy to be the trustee

Of my heart and all that entails

And all of that would have unveiled

I guess it’s just you’re loss

With your plans to double cross

 

Stolen Kisses

Stolen Kisses

We see each other in passing routinely

Sneaking a peak here and there

So very discreetly

Words unspoken in midair

When the elevator doors closed

He reached in and kissed my lips

Tongues danced like they were composed

With eyes closed like an eclipse

Tensions mounted as my heart skipped a beat

Not wanting it to end

As the doors opened we tried to play discreet

But inside we couldn’t pretend

This was not long awaited

The longing could not dismiss

Lips left much elated

Until the next time of stolen kisses

Warmth

 Warmth

Snowflakes decorating the sky

Winter chills brisk bite

Loneliness hard to deny

That person holding me through the night

Loving me to no end

Body heat rising

Fluids mixing to the perfect blend

Positions continuously revising

Defining ecstasy with chemistry untamed

Arising eruptions unable to conceal

Heart lustfully inflamed

My dreams so alive, almost surreal

Intrigued

Dali Salvador

Intrigued by the depths of you

Got me wondering if I should pursue

Curiosity is getting the best of me

Putting myself out there with no guarantee

I am feeling your sexy style

Hopeful you are worthwhile

Not looking for anything serious

Loving the mysterious

Wanting to know what it takes to make you smile

Levels of you trying to compile

Piecing together the real you

Asking myself if you are true

I have enjoyed time spent

Curious of your intent

Time will only tell

If things will excel or we say our farewells

Actions speak louder than words could ever

Hoping we are successful in our endeavor

Eager to see if you can take my breathe and leave me fatigue

You have me very intrigued…

Vibe

Vibe

Vibes flowing within my veins

Of thoughts remain

On the tip of my pen

Releasing over and over again

Flooding paper with unspoken words

Previously unheard

No longer locked inside

All my secrets I confide

Feeling the rhythm

Becoming the victim

Getting lost in thought

Inner battles being fought

Verses being scribed

Syncing with each syllable of this vibe

 

Awaken

Awaken Love-Charlotte Atkinson

Awaken

His touch awakens, as a breath of fresh air

His kiss evokes feelings deep

Way beyond a casual affair

With my heart at ease, comes peaceful sleep

His heart soothes inner fears

His eyes confirm sincerity

Wiping away stains left from trails of tears

Walls tumbling, leaving room for prosperity

His personality completely comforts, emotions ignite

His hands guide in new undiscovered directions

Withstanding disagreements, previews a different light

Willingly demonstrates truth behind affections

His voice fills my ears, profoundly outspoken

Words don’t give justice to an unwritten lyric

With him, love prevails the unspoken

His love fully awakens my spirit

 

Beauty- HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME :)

HAPPY 35TH BIRTHDAY TO ME :)

Beauty

Fresh hair cut and color; make up looking fierce

Eyes deep enough to pierce

My fresh black pumps with the newly manicured toes out

Looks are deceiving; inside I am overcoming self doubt

Tight, sexy dark blue jeans with the red low cut top

Making all of the on-looking mens jaw drop

Cute baby face on the outside

But who wants to really know the complete inside

Short in height and small in frame

Does anyone care whats really in my brain

Focused and professional. but always real

When will someone truly care how I really feel

Smiling face in front of others

Can we truly trust one another

Not impressed unless they can really connect mentally

And not only for satisfaction that only lasts momentarily

The eyes are the key to ones soul

Look deep inside that person and see thier true role

Everyone in life is not for keeps

Every night I singly sleep

Choosing not to settle for less than I deserve

My full heart I have chosen to reserve

It's not in my physical description, but whats in my heart

My inner beauty is my true work of art

Just Once More

Just Once More

Lying here in this bed next to him

Wanting him to touch and love me until my knees go numb

Longing to feel his soft kisses on my neck

Loving me all the way down past the small of my back

His hands caressing my thighs as gentle as a feather

Making my senses alert and sensitive to his touch

Craving to feel him inside

Taking me to our special sensual place

Indulging into pure ecstasy

Falling asleep in his arms, awakening to his much desired kisses

But instead

I lay next to this man I love with every molecule of my body

Hurting, missing the love we shared

Both knowing we cannot be, not now

But the love we share is so powerful and keeps pulling us back

Now we lay here as two friends would

Pretending we don’t want to give in

Just once more…

 



Stimulation

Stimulation

His lips taste as sweet as chocolate strawberries

The love he continuously gives, my heart carries

Softly rubbing his sexy, clean shaven bald head

Knowing repeated eruption is not far ahead

While his juicy lips are gently massaging me

From my head all the way down to my feet

His hands slowly caressing, bringing sensations to new heights

Perfecting tongue wrestling fights

Stimulating each and every one of my senses

Licking up the fluids my body endlessly dispenses

Anticipating returning the favor

Each drop of him I truly savor

Loving each and every part of him

Until he feels complete numbness in his limbs

His muscular arms cradling my body to the best position

Forcing me into total submission

Following his lead

From his reactions I feed

Pure ecstasy refined

Memories I replay in my mind

 

AIDS-National AIDS Day

In loving memory of

Joe Hurlburt

 (Pictured on your left, the tallest one)

March 17, 1971 - July 9, 1997

AIDS

Aids took over and totally consumed his body

Causing him constant immeasurable pain

The pain was so great that he pushed away everybody

Until he was unable to maintain

He was no longer the brother I once knew

He had only himself to blame

This is the brother that taught me how to tie my shoes

He tortured himself in shame

He was scared to die but it was now a reality

All he wanted was to be loved

And now he was paying for his sexuality

He died feeling completely unloved

Except from his family and the people who really mattered

My mom had to watch her son slowly wither away

Her world was forever shattered

His death affected everyone around

I not only lost my brother but my best friend

Even though 13 years has passed, his presence still surrounds

The sorrow of missing him will never end

The memories I will never forget

The good and bad times I will always cherish

There is not a moment of regret

I still can’t believe his life on earth has been perished

I will hold his love in my heart forever

And the lessons he taught

His son never really knew his father however

His battle on earth has been fought

Good Morning All! Today is National AIDS day, a very important day for me since my brother succumbed to this horrible disease. People think they are invincible, just as he did. This is a very serious issue, please protect yourself. A moment of satisfaction could lead to a horrible death, one that I wouldnt wish upon my worst enemy.