Monday, January 7, 2013

Lost

Just to hear you open the door, my teeth would cringe
Each time you came back from your binge
The entire week you left me to fend for myself, not giving a shit
Your problem, you would never admit
So yea, I was beyond pissed
For that drug, I was totally dismissed
Got all up in your face
Angry and throwing punches all over the place
Until you picked me up and flung me across the room
Accusations of cheating you assumed
Your guilty conscious was taking over and distorting
From all that powder your nose was snorting
You raised your hand
My eye was where your fist would land
Knocking me back into the mirror, glass shattering in pieces
My girls witness in horror, their screaming increases
Please leave mommy alone, I hear
Just wanting to crawl into a hole and disappear
Not knowing how to approach them, not knowing what to say
Still embarrassed, in shock and feelings in disbelief and disarray
You run again, to your drug in shame
When your actions, you’re the only one to blame
How did we get to this point
I ran for His word to anoint
While you allowed yourself to be overtaken
Taking a life that could have been mine, His word forsaken
Where was this man I committed my life to
I was lost with nowhere to turn, having no clue what to do
Went into months of dark depression
Years of self destruction as an obsession
My soul mate took my soul
We were now lost, without restraint or self control



.

5 comments:

Brian Miller said...

oy you took the opposite side of lost today...how hard as well for them to go away and take so much of you with them...and not knowing where to turn as well....

Reggie said...

Very powerful post!!!

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